Friday, August 3, 2012

Sledgehammers and Telescopes

My job takes place at a facility with many old buildings, and I spent much of today gutting the basement of one with a sledgehammer. Since my brain was incapable of producing anything of merit, I happily abandoned my normal desk duties for a chance to spend several hours obliteration drywall and framing. In the proccess, I nearly beaned myself in the head numerous times and stepped on two nails only to have them pass within a millimeter of my skin. After several hours of work, I was thoroughly coated with dirt and had inhaled enough dust and mold that I probably will develop some lung infection even though I was wearing a mask. Needless to say, it was an awesome day at work, even better for the fact that smashing things with a sledgehammer requires little thought, leaving the mind free to ponder at will, and my thoughts naturally drifted towards my steampunk novel. Speaking of which, check out this lovely beauty I purchased yesterday at Hobby Lobby for $35. 


Sadly, it does not have the functionality I would like - it does magnify but objects in the glass are fuzzy and indistinct, so this will have to be for costuming purposes only. Then again, if one decides to hold a telescope up to one's ear as Captain Robert of Abney Park does on some of the cover photos of the Ophelia crew, this particular device would work splendidly and the viewing end is specially treated to resist earwax stains (okay, just kidding. Sorry about that, Captain Rob!)

I was actually fiddling with my new toy yesterday while sitting inside my car in the parking lot of a Walgreens waiting for a friend to call me back. I kept sweeping it back and forth along 72nd street seeing if I could get a clearer picture when it dawned on me that considering our country and our hyper-vigilance about anything that could be possibly construed as danger, perhaps pointing a long, vaguely barrel-shaped object at the main street of Omaha was not the most strategic of actions. Granted, if I actually garnered the attention of an alert policeman and the newspapers happened to pick up on the event, I could get some awesome publicity for steampunk in general and my upcoming novel. Hmm.....add to my to-do list, "Get arrested while wearing steampunk garb because police noticed suspicious behavior." 

This time, I avoided arrest which was a good thing since I had an appointment with a friend to work on a costume. Said friend actually solicited my assistance, which caused me no end of hilarity. This is because I have zero fashion sense when it comes to day-to-day clothing. No one has ever (nor probably will) begged me to accompany them on a trip to the mall because I have such excellent taste in clothing. The only reason I know the name "Dolce and Gabbana" is because when I taught ad analysis in writing classes, my students inevitably brought in ads from this brand. Clothes shopping is one of my most hated activities. Yet, for some befuddling reason, I love putting costumes together and apparently do so well enough that my expertise is consulted on the occasion. 

Speaking of which, on the list tonight - make a necklace for a video shoot I am doing with a friend tomorrow. The necklace will be composed of a cameo, tiny keys, gears, and black velvet ribbon. I will post a picture when it is done. 

That is, after I have finished grownup, non-steampunk activities such as replenishing the bare fridge and determining just how much paycheck is left after the mortgage has gulped down its share. But most importantly, deciding just how much I can budget for steampunk costuming this month and still maintain financial solvency. 


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