Thursday, November 29, 2012

Draft Surgery Time

Here she is! May I introduce you to Draft One of Steam on the Horizon?

She weighs in at 245 pages of 10 point 1.5 spaced one-sided text - I ran to Office Max yesterday and had them print out a copy, happy to discover that at the amount I was printing out, it was only 8 cents a page as opposed to 11. At home, I set to work rediscovering the text, reading through things that I had forgotten I wrote and scoring the paper liberally with question marks, little corrections, blackout lines, and other editing marks to note areas that needed work, revision, or exorcism.

I honestly do not like Chapter 1, and I think the problem is this movie I made with a friend for my Kickstarter project. The video has me reading the first couple pages of Chapter 1 with accompanying images. It is not the greatest piece of cinematic theater, which probably explains why it only has 36 views to date.

Whenever I read Chapter 1 of my text, what I hear in my head is my voice reading the text out loud. I don't particularly care for the way my voice sounds (it's always a shock to hear your recorded voice, isn't it?) and it's frustrating that Chapter 1 sounds so different in my head than the rest of the book. Once I get past the section where I am reading in the video, then the story sounds so much different in my head and I stop cringing.

Also, Chapter 1 and 2 seem a bit rushed - Chapter 1 deals with a boiler explosion and the aftermath, so there is quite a bit going on and things don't really slow down until Chapter 3. I like the pace of the story once Chapter 3 rolls around but I think Chapter 1 will need some major revision, especially since it is so important. If you get bored or confused in the first couple pages, you likely won't keep reading!

So this is what occupied my time yesterday until I glanced at the clock and realized I had ten minutes to get out the door to my new waitressing job. Training starts Monday, and work is not too far from my house, so I think this job will work out quite well. I am hoping to pull in 30 hours a week, maybe a little more, and I am anticipating that weight loss will be forthcoming with all the rushing around on my feet. Endless hours of sitting at a desk is a recipe for weight gain even if you are diligent about the gym.

One of my side projects is mentally designing steampunk Christmas ornaments and decorations. In the Victorian times, it was common for people to affix actual candles on a Christmas tree and light them for viewing (with a bucket of water close by for flame dousing purposes). Since this was naturally a risky activity and with the invention of electricity, electric lights were created. Steampunk technology, however, could be useful for the application of Christmas decorations. Perhaps an alternate energy source could power the lights or maybe the tree could be artificial and the whole thing could be powered to shine, sparkle, and even rotate?

Suddenly, a steampunk mistletoe comes to mind. I have no idea what that would look like, but I want to make one and put it over my door. Okay, that sounds like a fabulous idea - I have some fake mistletoe that I bought the other day, and I will find a way of steampunking it and will post pictures!


  1. Isn't it weird how our voices sound to ourselves? I just watched the video - honestly, I think you're reading it a little too fast. Plus the music is a bit distracting.

  2. Yeah, I'm not fond of the video, but Kickstarter required one, so this was a rush job and I don't like the overall concept. It was fun to shoot, but I would redo it if I do Kickstarter again.